The word selfish has always had such a negative connotation. The urbandictionary.com defines
selfish as having a total disregard for anyone but yourself and anyone else’s feelings. We don’t
want to be that kind of selfish. The selfishness that allows you to be good to others because you
were first good to yourself is what we want. To put oneself above others is always seen as
inherently wrong, but if you don’t put yourself first, who will? I know you have heard of the
saying an empty cup can not pour into others, and when we are “selfish,” it allows us to take
care of ourselves so we can tend to others. Most people have feelings of guilt or shame when
they put themselves first, but I’m here to tell you it is OK to make sure your needs are met. I am
going to highlight three benefits of being “Selfish.”
Selfishness Can Improve Your Self Esteem
Have you ever had a moment where you doubted yourself and your abilities? Your self-doubt
then spiraled into a cycle of negative self-talk? Improving your self-esteem can help with that.
Self-esteem can be defined as confidence in one’s worth or abilities; or beliefs in self. Being
selfish can help you explore yourself and your needs, which will positively impact your
self-esteem by helping you identify and improve your abilities. As your abilities and image of self
improve so will your self-esteem. When we have high self-esteem, our quality of life improves
because we are better able to cope with rejection and be more ambitious because we have
confidence in our abilities and understand our value. Having high self-esteem enables a person
to appreciate themselves and have a realistic judgment of themselves, their strengths, and
weaknesses.
Being Selfish Can Help You Improve Your Self Care.
Self-care is something a lot of people struggle with. It’s something people think they can neglect.
Self-care is shown through things we do to keep ourselves healthy by making improvements
and maintaining a good life balance. We practice self-care to make sure we are cared for
physically, mentally, and spiritually. When we are selfish, it can improve our awareness of what
we need, and it helps us take steps to make self-care a priority. Self-care can include having a
balanced diet, working out, journaling, praying, resting, and having “me time.” When we are
selfish, we will prioritize ourselves and have better self-care habits.
Being Selfish Can Improve Your Relationships

As said previously, if we are practicing being selfish, we do not want to have total disregard for
others. Another form of being selfish, is when a person is good to themselves so they can be
good to others. When we think about ourselves in the context of a relationship, whether platonic
or romantic, we are better able to enforce boundaries when we are selfish. Balance is key. It’s
perfectly fine to prioritize yourself in a relationship, and healthy ones give you the space to do
so. When we are selfish, we will take the time to identify relational boundaries and enforce them
when needed. It is important in any kind of relationship to have boundaries. Boundaries are rules
and guidelines we create to teach others how to treat us, and it’s essential that we identify and
enforce them. If you find yourself in relationships that don’t allow you to tend to yourself and
enforce your boundaries, it would be beneficial to evaluate that relationship.
Take Care Of Your Self!
When being selfish, it can be very uncomfortable, but we need to make sure our needs are
being met. Taking time to identify what we need is the first step in practicing selfishness. Once
we can identify our needs, we can take steps to make sure our needs are met. Remember,
selfishness allows you to be good to others because you were first good to yourself. I hope after
reading this, you will take some time to be a little bit “selfish.”